out of mind

semester 3 officially end.
finally,i am able to be free again from all those stressful days.
semester 3.i've been gone through a lot.
i am not asking something big.i just want someone who always beside me
accept me just the way I am.
not only the me who frequently people know.
but the real me which people never know.

the real me-semester 3
1.just because i am quiet and not talk much,people easily call me an arrogant.
the quiet i am it doesnt means im arrogant.i am just naturally born been like this.

2.sensitivity.Im quite sensitive although now I am really try my best to hold on my feeling.
its hard because once the sensitivity comes,it shows throughout my expression eventhough i am not really said it.

3.The more I tried to pleased everyone with kindest.The more people will expecting the same all again.I cant feel angry.because there are people will feel angrier with me.I can't sulking.because people will think that I am really childish.I really want to feel all the emotion.but people just can't let me to feel.even i cant feel to be in love and be loved by someone.

4.Honestly though this semester is completely different how the way i am when i was in semester 2.
in semeser 2,i tried to build up confidence inside me.change to positive energy.blend and interact will all people.
but in semester 3,i am completely changed.
seriously.i feel down.unmotivated.give up on everything.
maybe people will take noticed this.but as my stress and pressure feeling up.i am back to the old of me.my weight gains a lot..i am gave up on exercising,dieting and all.
i just feel lack of everything.
the lovelight i hope.used to wait for.
not there for me.at least as someone who always cheered me up.
the friend i cheerised.slowly disappear.
everything precious for me.slowly gone.
luckily..my family still there with me.

ive really nobody else to be someone that i can trust in poli
someone that will keep promise to keep the stories of mine in heart without let the even a person know.
everyone else is luckier because got a lot of friends.
but i am different.once i lost something..
its mean the world is alone as i am.